The Problem with Pride
In numerous Bible passages (like Proverbs 6:16-19) and throughout Christian history we find lists of sins that people engage in which, with God’s help and self-discipline, we’re to avoid to the best of our ability and for our own good. Perhaps best known outside the Bible are the seven deadly sins of pride, wrath, greed, sloth, lust, envy, and gluttony.
September 28, 2014
Proverbs 16:18, The Problem with Pride
Doug Scalise, Brewster Baptist Church
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The less we engage in those seven ways of thinking and being the better our life will be and the greater blessing we’ll be to everyone who knows us. A good case can be made that pride is the deadliest of the deadly sins. Proverbs 16:18 warns us, “Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall.” Today’s Dr. Seuss story The Zax is also about the problem with pride and it’s short enough that I can read you the whole story in less than two minutes.
“One day, making tracks
In the prairie of Prax,
Came a North-Going Zax
And a South-Going Zax.
And it happened that both of them came to a place
Where they bumped. There they stood.
Foot to foot. Face to face.
“Look here, now!” the North-Going Zax said, “I say!
You are blocking my path. You are right in my way.
I’m a North-Going Zax and I always go north.
Get out of my way, now, and let me go forth!”
“Who’s in whose way?” snapped the South-Going Zax.
“I always go south, making south-going tracks.
So you’re in MY way! And I ask you to move
And let me go south in my south-going groove.”
Then the North-Going Zax puffed his chest up with pride.
“I never,” he said, “take a step to one side.
And I’ll prove to you that I won’t change my ways
If I have to keep standing here fifty-nine days!”
“And I’ll prove to YOU,” yelled the South-Going Zax,
“That I can stand here in the prairie of Prax
For fifty-nine years! For I live by a rule
That I learned as a boy back in South-Going School.
Never budge! That’s my rule. Never budge in the least!
Not an inch to the west! Not an inch to the east!
I’ll stay here, not budging! I can and I will
If it makes you and me and the whole world stand still!”
Well… Of course the world didn’t stand still. The world grew.
In a couple of years, the new highway came through
And they built it right over those two stubborn Zax
And left them there, standing un-budged in their tracks.”[1]
The great thing about stories is that they can seem silly, yet there is often uncomfortable truth hiding in plain sight. We’re told the Zaxes are taught to only go one way, north or south, in reality they could have walked in any direction they wanted to – even east or west. They were raised, trained, and focused on what they should do rather than what they were able to do. When the North-Going Zax and the South-Going Zax find themselves on a collision course, neither will budge. They’re not two cars facing each other on a one lane stone bridge. Do you remember where they came face to face? In the prairie of Prax which looks like a desert that goes as far as the eye can see; there is literally nothing there but the two of them, not even a blade of grass. The point being – there was all kinds of room to come up with a solution and in this case a very simple one that cost nothing. All each had to do was take a half step to the right or left and they each could have kept going. But they didn’t; they were too proud, stubborn, rigid and stupid and they ruined and wasted the rest of their lives because neither of them would humble themselves or show any kindness, flexibility or creativity. This story bothered Jill from the time she was a little girl because they didn’t even have to move to one side; the Zaxes could have both kept going straight. For example, if one crawled through the other’s legs, or if one bent down and the other hopped over – they both could have kept going straight. But they lacked the vision and the willingness to find a solution and full of pride they stubbornly insisted it was the other who needed to change or move.
When one says he won’t budge for 59 days the other replies that he can wait for 59 years (apparently Zax don’t need to eat or use a restroom). Although their behavior and choices seem absurd, if we reflect for a moment we can search for the Zax in ourselves. The truth is “We will always have trouble growing as individuals and as a community of Christ if we are unwilling to change, unwilling to budge, unwilling to consider someone else’s feelings and perspectives. The fundamental flaw in both the North-Going Zax and South-Going Zax is pride. If we are honest, we will acknowledge that this same fundamental problem permeates human relationships in many different settings: internationally, nationally, and domestically in our communities and our families.”[2] Pride is such that it will always insist that it is the other who is unwilling to change, budge, or consider another perspective; it’s never us. The South-Going Zax refers back to how he was raised and what he was taught, “For I live by a rule That I learned as a boy back in South-Going School. Never budge! That’s my rule. Never budge in the least!”
Falling back on saying, “That’s the way I was raised,” is not a sufficient answer. It’s precisely this sort of attitude that perpetuates conflicts of all kinds; there is too much Zax like thinking among political leaders and followers of both major parties in the US and of nations around the world. No one will budge not for 59 days not for 59 years and nothing is ever solved. Ideologues and blowhards on both sides keep saying outrageous, frequently untrue things about those with a different view and no one considers compromising, no one is willing to change or grow because to do so suggests the possibility one might not have been 100% right and their pride doesn’t allow that. Even when statements are demonstrated to be false, people don’t apologize or express gratitude for being shown the truth. So we’re governed by Zax and nothing gets done. Pride would rather self-destruct than change. I’d love to see the majority and minority leaders of the House Kevin McCarthy (R) and Nancy Pelosi (D) read The Zax out loud in the House with a third person serving as the narrator.
This is not to say there are not principles that we’re to hold on to and advocate for; yet pride is so slippery that people will insist that the things we refuse to consider changing our thinking about are precisely those kind of absolute principles and the things that others refuse to budge on don’t have the same level of authority, validity, or significance. When opinions carry more weight than facts you can be sure that pride is involved. It’s like the saying, “When I complain it’s because it’s good to get things off my chest. When you do, I remind you that no one likes a complainer.” Pride and stubbornness impact all our relationships; they are a poison that attacks parents and children; husbands and wives, sisters and brothers, neighbors and friends. People dig in, hold grudges, refuse to forgive, too proud to admit any role in the estrangement and unwilling to move. And everyone suffers and everyone loses.
In one of the great chapters in the Bible, 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a, Paul tells us in words that are very familiar yet not practiced enough, “Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.” Love is one thing to hold on to and to practice without wavering or faltering.
There is a difference between the kind of pride that God hates (Proverbs 8:13) and the kind of pride we feel about a job well done or the pride we take in someone else’s successes or accomplishments. The kind of pride that stems from self-righteousness is sin, and God hates it because it’s a hindrance to seeking the Lord. Psalm 10:4 explains that the proud are so consumed with themselves that their thoughts are far from God: “In his pride the wicked does not seek him; in all his thoughts there is no room for God.” This kind of haughty pride is the opposite of the spirit of humility that God seeks: “Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven” (Matthew 5:3). The “poor in spirit” are those who recognize their utter spiritual bankruptcy and their inability to come to God aside from divine grace. The proud, on the other hand, are so blinded by their pride that they think they have no need of God or, worse, that God should accept them as they are because they deserve His acceptance.
A godly companion to love which is also the antidote for unhealthy pride is humility. The Lord says through Isaiah, “This is the one to whom I will look, to the humble and contrite in spirit, who trembles at my word.” Proverbs 22:4 says, “The reward for humility and fear of the Lord is riches and honor and life.” In the Bible that we learn that God leads the humble, teaches the humble (Psalm 25:9), and gives grace to the humble (James 4:6). Even when we seek to learn God’s word and to be led and taught by the Lord, life can humble us in other ways. Our health can change, our finances can take a turn, the future is never guaranteed and frequently we have to adjust and adapt to the unexpected. All these situations can be opportunities to learn humility, reliance on God, and greater trust in God’s word.
Where do you find yourself today when it comes to pride and humility? Augustine gave the following advice to people who wanted to get ahead, “Do you wish to rise? Begin by descending. You plan a tower that will pierce the clouds? Lay first the foundation of humility.” I think most of us find genuine humility appealing in other people, but arrogant pride is almost always a turnoff. On May 1, 1991, Oakland Athletics outfielder Rickey Henderson stole his 939th base to break Lou Brock’s record for the most stolen bases in a career which was a remarkable achievement. He lifted third base over his head and said, “Now I am the greatest of all time.” Apparently he wasn’t familiar with Proverbs 27:2 “Let another praise you, and not your own mouth; a stranger, and not your own lips.” Because God is a baseball fan and also has a sense of humor that same day 44-year-old Nolan Ryan pitched the record 7th no hitter of his career and took all the headlines away from Rickey Henderson. It was pretty funny and everyone was happy for Nolan Ryan as well as Henderson.
Sadly, the story of the Zax, unlike most Dr. Seuss stories, has an unhappy ending. A whole world gets built around the North-Going Zax and the South-Going Zax – a world with a highway, cars, buildings, and bridges. The longer they stood there the less room they have to move. Their pride is hardened and there is no end in sight to their foolish impasse. They picked “My way or the highway” kind of thinking and even when the highway came in, but they still didn’t budge. A highway allows the world to grow by connecting one place to another, bringing new people to new areas. If you look closely, the line “Of course the world didn’t stand still. The world grew” appears right before the highway is introduced. The road is a nice contrast to the Zax. In the picture in the book it shapes itself around obstacles while the Zax very stubbornly refuse to move any way they don’t want to move.
In the midst of strained relationships with others perhaps we can learn to be more like the highway in the story, than the Zax. We can ask God to humble us and open us to being willing to admit we may have been mistaken or we may even have been right but been so arrogant about it that we caused a rift. Remember the Zax we’re able to move in more than one direction, they simply chose not to. They allowed their pride to stand in the way. Pride closes doors in relationships, sometimes it slams them shut. Humility on the other hand, opens doors to forgiveness, reconciliation, relationships, and learning. Love and humility are the opposite of pride.
A philosopher in another tradition (Lau Tzu, 604-531 BC) wrote 2,500 years ago: “I have three precious things which I hold fast and prize. The first is gentleness; the second frugality; the third is humility, which keeps me from putting myself before others. Be gentle and you can be bold; be frugal and you can be liberal; avoid putting yourself before others and you can become a leader among men.”
Swallow your pride occasionally, it’s non-fattening and has no calories and no cholesterol. The great 16th century reformer of the church Martin Luther said, “God created the world out of nothing, and so long as we are nothing, He can make something out of us.”
Blessing: As God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience. 13 Bear with one another and, if anyone has a complaint against another, forgive each other; just as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. 14 Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. 15 And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in the one body. And be thankful. Colossians 3:12-15
Questions for Discussion or Reflection:
How would you describe the difference between healthy pride in people or accomplishments and unhealthy pride which can cause us to puff ourselves up in self-righteousness or arrogance?
Why does pride so often lead to destructive behavior and to people falling in all sorts of way?
In what ways have you seen or experienced, like the Zax in the Dr. Seuss story, pride, stubbornness, and a refusal to budge being harmful for relationships?
Why do you think so many passages in the Bible speak about God being with the humble in spirit rather than with the proud?
What is it about being humble or having humility that is an advantage spiritually when it comes to our relationship with God?
What is at least one way you can repent from pride and practice humility in the coming week?
[1] From The Sneetches and Other Stories Copyright 1961 by Theodor S. Geisel and Audrey S. Geisel, renewed 1989.
[2] The Gospel According to Dr. Seuss, James W. Kemp, p. 30.